my sentiment exactly

found this on xkcd the other day. this pretty much encapsulates my theories on growing up. …hence why the return of the ball pit is one of the many things i’m looking forward to this VidCon. 😛


xkcd.com

it now also happens to be one of the things you will see by my desk at work.

>YouTube is magic

>YouTube is magic.

i’m sure i’ve written this sentiment before, but i have no problem reiterating.

YouTube is magic.

i had one of those nights where you sit down at your computer at a decent hour to be sitting down at your computer (8:30-9pm) and you don’t stop watching the YouTubes until midnight. i started at Black Box TV, then to 7NAP, then to the latest from Dome, then to the latest Frezned, then some older Frezned, then Meekakitty (who i hadn’t watched before!), then a Whataboutadam (who i also hadn’t watched before), then back to Meekakitty. she’s psycho! i now LOVE her! i mean, i thought she was pretty cool when i met her in person at VidCon, but seeing her vlogs and knowing who she is… well, she’s epic!

and that’s just how YouTube goes, ya know. you can even meet someone for real, “IRL” (i still hate that phrase. but it’s your name. shut up! we’re not talking about that.), and STILL not really not know them without seeing their vlogs. is that what life is now? no one will be real to me unless i’ve seen their vlogs?

i think vlogs say something about a person. how alike they are to their vlogs vs. how much is scripted is rather telling i think. like, i try to be very much myself in my vlogs. or at least show the more energetic side of me. cuz my calm side would be boring. XD but yeah, you see Meekakitty in person and it’s the same as she is in vlogs. but you see Alex Day (Nerimon) and he’s just really calm. he like, takes his energy level up a notch. literally! he jumps up and down a few times to get the blood flowing. it’s like… watching a transformation. but a very subtle one. it’s not that it’s a farce, more like a facet. it’s real, but it’s just one side that he’s turned to. i think i do so as well, but in a far less extreme sense. i think my calm and energetic are probably less extreme than his. and Meekakitty seems not to have facets. she just is. which is awesome.

but all of that was NOT THE POINT! the point was, it’s amazing how YouTube is this thing full of interesting people to watch, you just haven’t found them yet. it’s packed with awesome that is free to access if you have the time. and it’s interactive! there’s nothing else in the world like it!

my money is like… well the money situation is looking grimmer than a few months ago. but i do know one thing: i’m going to VidCon. (and i’ll be staying in a hotel this time. definitely with Tiff. but hopefully also with Meg and Lydia. also with whoever else will fit in our floorspace. but this is neither here nor there.) it was the most amazing experience of my life and i know next year can only surpass it. and i would be cheating myself NOT to go.

also, i’m going to be vlogging. cuz it does the body good. or at least it does the brain and possibly the social situation (if you’re a nerd like me) good. and even if it didn’t, i just like it. there’s nothing like vlogging and when i don’t do it, i miss it.

so after tomorrow, 4 day weekend, yo! and Thanksgiving. fits into that 4 day weekend. so turkey. and eating. and awesome. and stuff. yeah.

anyway. it’s late, and i need to sleep now. so i’m gonna do that. later! ^_^<!– text

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>vlogging changed my life, yo!

>hey blog!

i nearly forgot about you already! can you believe it??? i know!

hmm… a song… a song… here’s one i like!

Nico Vega – So So Fresh by ChelseaIRL

i just love the energy of that song! it’s just bursting! oh, and fun fact: i usually am listening to whatever song i put at the top while i write the rest of the blog. bonus fact: i put the song at the top so you can hit play and listen to it while you read.

there is just not enough time in the day, you know that? i didn’t even go to work today, and yet it feels like i’m still just as behind as without a day off! too many things to do! :/

i must admit, i’m not in much of a blogging mood, all. but that’s because i’m working on my #secretproject right now and i want to be thinking about that, and i can’t talk about it here. at least not till Thursday. so…

what shall we talk about blog? oh! we can talk about how i never did post my 5 part VidCon video! i’m kinda at the point that i think no one cares. so, if anyone still actually cares for me to post it, then i’ll finish editing it. otherwise it’ll just be another thing that sits quietly on my hard drive. there is a small collection of things there. ideas that never came to fruition. poor abandoned videos.

thinking of videos, i really would like to start vlogging more often. i really don’t think i do so often enough. especially considering i only have my channel and 7NAP. and 7NAP is never a chore. i mean, sometimes i don’t feel like vlogging, but i’d rather do it than not.

i’ve been thinking a lot about persona lately. reality vs. perception. my goal in my vlogs is always to be what you get in real life in the present realm. because i think that’s kind of the hardest thing to achieve in a vlog. an actual, accurate representation of yourself. i mean, we all edit out the worst parts. so you’re never really getting the real picture. so my new approach to vlogging is to cut the time of filming. if i want to make a video that’s 4 minutes long, then i should record for no longer than 5 minutes. i mean, there are obviously gonna be moments where i pause and such, but overall i want to keep everything i do in. that way you get the real me. so yeah, that’s the plan. vlog more often and take less time to do it.

ok, i’m about to get rather corny right now, so just skip the next paragraph if you have a weak stomach, but i really think that VidCon changed me. something about spending three days straight surrounded by people who think like you, like the same things you like, and just generally like being nice to each other… it’s like you can’t believe such a thing could be possible until you live in it. and it also makes you kind of feel validated in a way. like, so yeah, none of the people that surround you in your present life get you. but there are literally hundreds of people who are just like you, so it doesn’t really matter. it’s like, “well, you can look at me weird all you want. cuz i know that these other hundred people like what i’m doing.” and that confidence is the way i’ve changed. it’s not some HUGE change. i’m not a different person. i’m just a lot more secure about being that person.

a strange, but relevant example is music. i’ve always been very self-conscious about my musical taste. i really do believe that music says something about what kind of person you are. so i’m kind of afraid that people will judge me if i don’t like the right music or something. in other words, before VidCon, i would NEVER have decided to stick songs i like in all of my blogs for a month. i mean, now and then to convey a certain emotion, but EVERY day?! NO WAY! that leaves me way to exposed!!! but now, it’s ok.

alright, so now that we’ve come full circle, i think i can bid you good night, and go back to working on something that you will (hopefully) think is awesome! 🙂
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>in the future

>hello blog!

so, i am very excited about VidCon. i mean, VERY excited. i mean, i think about it at least once a day. if it’s not getting stuff to be signed and how i’m going to acquire those signatures for both myself and the Guide, then it’s the birthday celebration part of the weekend and figuring out the logistics of it.
turning another year older is not impressive to me in the least. in fact, i would very much like NOT to get a year older. the celebration with friends who normally are in different states and countries however, sounds wonderful!

there are two things i’m doing, appropriately on video, for VidCon.
1) i’m doing a three part series (there are three History Mondays on 5BD till VidCon) covering cameras and video and the like.
2) i’m going to be vlogging every day from June 9th – July 8th in a project designed for all those going to VidCon to a) get to know each other and b) dust off those neglected channels and get reacquainted with video making. VidCon does, after all, stand for Video Conference.

so last night i watched a bunch of Gears‘ (the one responsible for this brilliant idea) videos and he did a thing where he vlogged every day in March. (i don’t know if he was aware of VEDA at the time) and he did it so that he would stop planning every aspect of his videos, from his background to his clothing. and this new project of his, vlogging every day till VidCon, will help me achieve goals a and b, but it will also help me do what Gears did in March. stop being so freaking self-conscious!!!

i’ve done it with this blog. my last blog post would NEVER have happened if i had been self conscious about it. it’s so fangirl! “i don’t want to be seen as a fangirl! ugh! i’d rather be dead!” and, of course, everyone reading my blog is going to disregard every post i’ve ever written before, and every blog after, and judge me solely on the “fangirl blog.”

so i need to have the same approach with my vlog. nothing will ever get posted to that channel if i keep being self-conscious about it! i have footage from at least 2 or 3 videos that i’ve never posted because i was too self-conscious.

so while we’re talking about things i’m going to start doing, i’ve been wanting to do something, another device to get me vlogging, less self-conscious and getting to know people better: no comments, only vid response.

i can record video and post to YT straight from my phone, and my video camera has a feature to download straight to YT, so it’s not like loading a bunch of response videos would be a hassle. i have a small arsenal of technology that makes it incredibly easy. so after VidCon, this is my plan!

also, Daily Booth. i HAVE NOT been posting to DB enough! and once again, it’s because i don’t want to take a boring picture. god forbid i’m not perceived as absolutely brilliant and fascinating! so expect those a bit more often as well! 🙂

so that should more or less cover my online plans for the next 2 months. XD <!– text

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