>hello blog! wow! it’s been a WHILE! did you miss me?!
ok, that was rhetorical. we both know you didn’t, but that doesn’t mean you should say so!
ok, so i found this little gem waiting for me in my email this morning. take a gander:
so there are several flaws in this proposition. let us go through them now.
- ok first, this is an ad. it is trying to entice people. “If you jus tried a bit harder you wud get notice more” that’s kind of insulting. they’re saying i’m not trying hard enough? also, “You cud do well to watch it”. F you! you condescending prick!
- “this is the first time i saw a real Vid No the people acting up for the cam n stuff u got raw talent.” i’d say, anyone watching YouTube for a “long time” has most likely seen a “real vid.” it’s just plain statistics. not to mention, EVERYONE is “acting up for the cam”!!! psych 101, anybody? and finally, i think we can all agree that there are many vloggers with far more “raw talent” than i possess! *cough*Lydia*cough*Meg*cough**choke*charlieissocoollike*cough**splutter**cough*vlogbrothers*cough* whoa! written cough attack! brutal!
- apparently, ol’ Marcus was simultaneously inspired by 21 individuals. AMAZING! all of us, just oozing with untapped “raw talent”!
- Marcus apparently goes by the alias Emeline Tery Anese (emelineteryanese). what i can only interpret as three female names. fascinating.
- who the eff is emalineteryanese?!?! your ad might be a little more convincing if ANYONE knew who the fuck you are.
- improper use of gratuitous punctuation. i mean, seriously! “amazing video!!!!!!!..” and you’ve all read my writing! there’s an example of gratuitous punctuation in my last point(s)! i enjoy gratuitous punctuation! …and smileys. but i digress.
- you didn’t think i wasn’t gonna mention the grammer (or, more precisely, the lack thereof) did you? seriously, this is the piece de resistance!
- the optional punctuation. sometimes we end our sentences with a period, sometimes we don’t. completely random!
- the random capitalization of the word “vid” along with the lowercase “i’s”. freakin’ hell!
- misspelled words that i just found generally offensive (in order of appearance): cam, n, jus, wud, alot, ya, and cud. yes, i know that “cam” and “ya” aren’t that offensive, but in conjunction with the rest of this mess, they’re intolerable.
so yeah. btw, i hate YouTube spam. especially poorly (if at all) thought out spam. also, i needed to update you, blog, since i haven’t updated in forever, so i thought i’d share this! ^_^<!– text
rows of: 2 pics should be 375×250 or 300X500 3 pics should be 200×150 or 200×300 4 pics should be 175×100 or 175×225 1 picture should be 700×420 or 420×700 2 videos should be 234×380 –>