>something good (for a change)

>so my friend Charlie from 7NAP just made a wonderful video with a positive message about self-esteem. i am proud to say that i was part of this project and i am so proud of her for both coming up with the project, and making such a fantastic video. if you haven’t watched it, please do and have everyone you know watch it as well. it really is worth it. 🙂

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>boy or girl? – BEDA 24

>
hi blog! so, as promised, grumpy Chelsea went to sleep last night and awoke as refreshed, even-tempered, sound-minded, messy-haired, happy Chelsea. i would have linked to the grumpy Chelsea 7NAP video yesterday, but it was still uploading, so here it is today:

so, yes, i still think it epically sucked that i didn’t get to make the super-fun video i wanted to make due to lack of tweet participation, but i think i made a pretty good video despite me not wanting to even look at my camera, let alone turn it on, talk at it for 10 minutes, and then spend 45 minutes editing. that’s right. 45 minutes, sometimes an hour. aka i suck at editing. don’t judge me.

but i digress. actually no, i didn’t digress at all. i was completely on topic, however not the topic i would like to blog about today, and i rather like saying “digress” so i said it anyway. i also like saying “remiss” but i seldom get to say it. however now, i really am digressing.

so here it is kids! blog 24! (except not literally blog 24 because i kinda failed a couple times. :/)

(wait, are you cheering about the blog, or the fail?)

so, i’m making a sincere effort to catch up on the backlog in my sub box. and, in doing that, i’m making a lot of comments today. and sometimes, when i comment on a guy’s stuff, i tend to say things that are very girly because i am, after all, a girl, but i have a kind of guyish s/n. (coolhandjohnny) more than once i have found myself adding to the end of my comment, “i’m a girl btw.” i was about to do it today, but then left it off. the comment was on an sxephil video and i said, “i love that you love me in a weird way, and i love you in a weird way as well.” (or something extremely similar.) and sometimes there are videos that ask for female viewer opinions that i also feel it necessary to append my disclaimer.

the thing is: is it necessary to append my disclaimer?

again, i say i didn’t add it the sxephil love comment because i thought, “well, worst case scenario people think i’m a strange guy or gay guy.” which isn’t bad, i’d just much rather people know that i’m a girl.
now i chose my s/n because i wanted something generic, maybe even a bit guyish because, it’s sadly still a fact that, male opinions get more respect than female. i’ve been in debates in comment sections before where, when they knew i was a girl, the rebuttal included sexist remarks that called me out as inferior for being a woman. while i’ve also gotten remarks from equally sexist guys who said sexist remarks to the female sounding s/n’s (like sexyangel), but gave me a legitimate, albeit idiotic, answer.

so it’s both served me well, and failed me. i also find that it’s rather unique, so it does serve as identifying me as the individual that is coolhandjohnny. if you see that s/n, you can pretty much rest assured that it’s me. but also, it comes from the movie Cool Hand Luke. and while i remember the impression the movie left behind (i cried and everything!), i don’t remember too much of the movie itself. and as such, does it represent the individual that is me?

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>bad mood

>
Fatigue Meter: 10

Chelsea and the terrible, horrible, no good, very bad day.

ok, so it wasn’t that bad (like at all), but i still wanted to say that. (book nostalgia FTW!)i wish i had written my blog earlier when i was in a better mood.

as much as i’d like to say i’m totally over it, i’m totally not over the fact that my plan for an epic video was epic alright. an epic fail.

so, i sent this tweet this morning. and no one replied. which rather sucked since i think it was a genuinely good idea.

it’s times like these that make you want to delete your twitter account. :/

anywho, since i sent the “important” email with all the details that everyone needs to know for the big meeting on Sunday, i really haven’t wanted to think about the Guide. and for the most part, i haven’t thought about it. i have tweets set to be sent automatically, so the one today was actually written days ago.

ugh! i’m talking about twitter again!

from Feb 5th:
so i’ve been thinking a lot lately about how awkward and slightly creepy it is to have friends online. don’t get me wrong, i love you guys. but, see, that’s the problem. it’s kind of creepy that i love you guys.
let’s look at the facts. with the exception of one person, i have never actually met any of the people i talk to online. i have a few people’s addresses, but no one’s phone numbers. i know what all of you look like, sound like, and quite a few of your favorite things. i know your aspirations and even a few of your fears. i also happen to talk to most of you at least once a day. even if only briefly via twitter. and if i don’t talk to you, i at least get an update via twitter/facebook/youtube/your blog.
ps. i wish the content of my blogs matched the quality of most of my titles. :/

my thoughts now: first, i’d like to point out that this is a perfect example of the fact that sometimes i write the last line before i’m finished with the post. i did that with my last blog entry as well.

ugh! i keep trying to turn this blog around and make it positive, but my mood just really sucks! every time i make an attempt to turn it around, it just u-turns and goes right back to negative! i can’t write an entry about internet friends when i’m this moody. ok, i’m going to stop this blog post before it gets any worse, and i’m going to bed before my mood can get any worse.

good night!
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>let’s get ready to ramble!

>i’m not even gonna look at how long it’s been since i’ve written because i already know the conclusion: it’s been too long.
so i am now reading LOTR. since beginning this endeavor i’ve noticed a strange phenomenon. i avoid reading it despite enjoying it. i can only theorize that this is because of its size. at nearly 2 inches thick, it’s a little bit intimidating. (that’s what she said.)
7NAP is doing pretty well. challenges are in the works. i can’t wait till we start that! 😀
i’ve recently decided that i must begin practicing writing again. you know, like a journalist and not just blogs and random articles for The Guide. even thought i think i should do more stuff for The Guide as well.
so i have a few video ideas right now, and i wanted to do at least one of them last week, but my nose was all stopped up and i sounded weird so i didn’t do it. now i just need to find the time to make my videos.
i’ve also gotta work on putting together my culture packages. apparently Steve and Dome have joined in on the fun. i wish i had been told sooner than just yesterday! and i’m glad i hadn’t already bought stuff! that would’ve sucked if i had already started shopping and then found after the fact that they were participating.
so can i get another hour added to the day? please? please???

Song of the Day:

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>new years eve

>i can’t believe it’s the last day of the year. it’s all gone by so fast!

if you told me January of last year that some of my coolest friends would end up being overseas, i wouldn’t have believed you. i also didn’t know what a Nerdfighter was, so…

if you asked me why i’m on the staff of The Guide and why i’m determined to make it a reality, i would tell you it’s because being a Nerdfighter and being part of the Nerdfighter community has not only changed my life and exposed me to amazing people, but it has changed me! who and what i have at the top of my value list is different. and i never want that to change.

as for “irl” changes (irl being in quotes because some of the friendships i’ve made online this year seem more real than the ones in the supposed irl) nothing really has changed. i still go to work and see and talk to my friends occasionally. “occasionally” meaning almost never.

last year at this time i had a desperate hope that better things were coming.

so much unlike last year, i look forward to the new year! because i KNOW good things are coming! VidCon, for one thing, is guaranteed to be AWESOME! (plus it’s happening the weekend before my birthday. so instead of a little party, i’ll be going to VidCon!)

7NAP. it’s fun! and we’re just starting! which is so exciting! (video tomorrow! yay!)

The Guide. oh, The Guide. well, it’s gonna be epic. and i’m freakin’ part of it! i’m on the freakin’ Staff! it can’t be more awesome than that.

who knows what else this year holds for me? a podcast hopefully. but then, who knows?

see you all in the New Year! <3
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>update… tl;dr

>so i’ve been posting a lot lately, but i haven’t really been talking about what’s going on with me. which is rather strange considering that this is my blog. in fact, i don’t even think i’ve mentioned The Guide to Nerdfighting …in your pants. which is weird since i’m absolutely obsessed with it. (my mother wants to strangle me every time she hears the word Nerdfighter now.)

so, i should probably go in chronological order, but since time in my universe doesn’t flow in a manner compatible with the rest of existence, that probably won’t end up working too well. so i’ll just have to write it the way it makes sense in my head!

so this morning i was driven to work by my mechanic. whom i’d never met before. because my mom always dealt with him. it. was. SURREAL. he has a beige Mercedes circa 1987 which looks much like this:
so old car, old guy, playing old music. i mean old like “Somewhere Over the Rainbow” by Judy Garland. literally.

i saw Hank Green last Saturday, and i posted pictures of that, but i didn’t write about it. as you would expect it. was. EPIC. in the middle of playing songs, he took questions for about half an hour. he answered everything from “what did you do before vlogbrothers?” to “pirates or ninjas?” to “Star Wars or Star Trek?” at which point he answered Star Trek. at which point 50% of the room’s hearts, including my own, broke. it was quite a strange experience to hear almost exactly half of a room cheering while the other half gaped in shocked silence. and near the end of the blissfully long Q&A, people were casually asking questions and he was talking as if it were just an abnormally large conversation. oh, and just a fun little point: when Hank got to the line “I’d be wearing wizard robes with gold and red” in This Isn’t Hogwarts, all the Gryffindors in the room started cheering. <3
Dr Noise opened for him, and i feel really bad that since i was so centered on telling Hank about The Guide i didn’t get a signed copy of his CD. 🙁 my one regret of the night.

but speaking of The Guide it’s the most wonderful thing that could possibly happen. that is, it will be if we ever succeed in getting the word out about it! and for the record, i WILL be committing my letters to Hank and John to paper TODAY. i’ve written a message to Alex Day (aka Nerimon) and i’ll be writing to other hi-profile Nerdfighters soon! so we’ll see how this pans out. and on a side note, i’m no longer an Alan fan (for reasons related to The Guide). 🙁

oh! and i am going to Hawaii on Wednesday! and i am EXTREMELY excited about this! there are only two things that concern me. 1) i can’t go to The Guide meeting that following Sunday 2) i may not be able to make/post a video that Friday for 7NAP. there’s no way for me to remedy not being able to go to The Guide meeting, but i am going to make a video on Tuesday and ask one of the other girls to switch it to “public” on Friday. hopefully though, i’ll just be able to make a video from Hawaii.

and that brings up 7NAP, which is 7 Nerds-a-Plenty, the new video project i’m involved in which is in its second week. i’m Friday, so i’ll be posting a video later today. i will also be posting a video on my channel later, because i’ve been meaning to all week, but just haven’t gotten around to it.

and i think that gets me all caught up for now!

oh yeah, and i like Hank’s song “The Vegetables” more than i probably should. :/